JULY 9 - DAY 9
Working on creating new habits to look forward to
Day 9 - still a toddler in my sober journey but already making some fascinating discoveries about myself. Until very recently, I couldn’t wait until wine o’clock. I would anesthetize myself for the rest of the evening and consider that a good night. Mornings weren’t great obviously waking up in a fog with loathing and shame. Literally every since day one I have relished my evenings where I thought I would fear them. I am enjoying my Tazo tea and a blanket while watching a movie and remembering the end. I love yawning at 8:30 PM and try to remember what it feels like to actually be tired! I don’t wake up in a fog anymore and I literally can’t wait to enjoy quiet mornings with a coffee, my sober pals online and the joy of knowing I can do this thing. When I quit smoking 19 years ago I told myself it just wasn’t an option anymore to stop my brain from wandering to the”but I can just reduce how much I smoke”?! I shut that shit down with Almost yelling at myself “INAO”. It’s. Not. An. Option. Find another choice. And then I did.